Hurricane Irene

Thankfully, Irene was hyped up by the media to be a bigger storm than it actually was. There was far less damage than anticipated for pretty much all the states in her path. There was lots of damage where Irene made landfall, don't get me wrong, but significantly less than the media was thinking there would be. I got some non-perishables Wednesday or Thursday, things we wouldn't have to cook if we lost power. By Friday night and Saturday afternoon, store shelves were bare in the bottled water and toilet paper aisles. Apparently, hurricanes are also laxatives because people think they're going to be trapped in their bathrooms for 5 weeks. We hunkered down Saturday night and awaited the storm. It was windy and rainy here, but I think we've had some worse thunderstorms lately to be honest. The only reason so many people lost power is because of how big the storm was, how much area it covered, and how long it lasted. We lost power for a minute or two Saturday night but it came right back on. I put Joey in his basket from his bassinet on our bed (Dan had no problems sleeping on the couch and playing the 360 until he was tired) so even if we lost power, I could still hear him and feed him.

Dan's family didn't have it as easy as we did. They live down a no-outlet community with TONS of trees everywhere. Dan's mom ended up spending Sunday night with us because she couldn't get home from work Sunday morning, there were downed trees and power lines blocking the entrance to the road! By today it had been cleared and she could go home, but they still didn't have power so frozen and refrigerated things came to live and be cooked at our house for dinner.

Word of the Week: Hurriquake

Leaving The Nursing Cover At Home

1. I wrote this post before Irene became a very real threat to the east coast. I'm still publishing it because I wrote down some of my feelings about breastfeeding and how I got to the level of comfort where I am now. I only changed the last part to reflect that I won't be going anywhere this weekend.

"Lactivism (portmanteau of 'lactation' and 'activism') is a term used to describe the advocacy of breastfeeding. Supporters, referred to as 'lactivists', seek to promote the health benefits of breastfeeding over formula-feeding and to ensure that nursing mothers are not discriminated against."
-Wikipedia.org

I have been a lactivist since childhood, according to this definition. There are LOTS of breastfeeding mothers in the homeschooling circles. I grew up around breastfeeding, it is so completely normal to me. It was even normal in front of *GASP* teenage boys *FAINT*. Breastfeeding has been so ingrained in me that there was never any doubt that it was what I would do for my babies when I was blessed with them. While I was pregnant, I had more breastfeeding dreams than I did weird/scarey pregnancy dreams. It wasn't until after Joey was born and after I did even more reading on the subject that I became more vocal about breastfeeding. More active in my lactivism.

Prior to becoming pregnant, I knew breastfeeding was pretty awesome. I knew it was healthier for the baby, I knew that it excellent for bonding, but what especially appealed to me was that it was free and super convenient--you can do it anywhere you go because your boobs don't detach! You can't lose a boob in the bottom of your diaper bag because you don't put your boobs in the diaper bag. That was about the extent of my knowledge of the facts of breastfeeding. And that was fine because I wasn't nursing yet.

I have a lot of conversations at work. A LOT. It's what helps the time pass and keeps us sane. Lots of different conversations with lots of different people, and generally the conversations stick to neutral topics. If you've known someone for a while though, topics can get a bit more spicy. I have a distinct memory of a conversation with a (female) co-worker about breastfeeding in public. It actually wasn't really a conversation, it was more a story about a time when she went out to dinner at a restaurant. There was a woman at this restaurant who was nursing her baby apparently. My co-worker was gravely offended. She did not say that she went over to the mother and asked her to move or anything like that. But I, someone who grew up around lactating boobs, could offer nothing in the poor nursing stranger's defense or even politely educate my co-worker. I had nothing. I didn't want to get into a heated argument with no ammunition, especially since our shifts can be pretty long and I wanted to continue passing time by having conversations with this woman (who is perfectly nice btw). So I nodded in understanding of her discomfort and we moved on to other topics.

I think that was the first time I was truly aware of the level of discomfort that breastfeeding in public (covered and otherwise) can cause in people. I knew that there were people out there who didn't like it, I had seen nursing covers and knew that people used them, but it hadn't really occurred to me just how controversial breastfeeding in public is. Growing up around it, I didn't realize that it wasn't the norm. Granted, I didn't see it in public outside our circle of friends, but I probably just didn't notice or figured that any babies we saw weren't hungry at the time.

Fast forward to being pregnant, knowing I was going to breastfeed both in private and in public, and remembering the conversation with that co-worker, I researched. Despite her discomfort with that stranger nursing her baby, she did more for breastfeeding than she realized. Because of that conversation, I read up on the laws in my state, I read all that I could in relation to why breastfeeding is so healthy both physically and emotionally, and yeah, I still loved that fact that it was free and convenient. That nursing mother who so offended my co-worker has my thanks because without her, that conversation wouldn't have happened and I wouldn't have been inspired to research the hell out of my boobs. That nursing mother put the active back in my lactivism and all she did was nurse her baby. She probably didn't even realize my co-worker had seen her or been offended. She was just nurturing her baby.

Now my baby is 3 months old and still nursing strong. I had so many great examples of breastfeeding growing up and both sides of the family have shown us tremendous support and I can't thank them enough. My childhood exposure combined with my research has given me a level of confidence I've never had before. I'm strictly a non-confrontation person. I avoid it at all costs. I am affected physically by confrontation, I literally get butterflies in my stomach, my face gets hot, my heart races, and depending on the confrontation, my hands may start to shake. This confidence for breastfeeding that I have feels incredible. I breastfed at a restaurant when Joey was 3 days old with a priest at our table (Fr. Daniel is awesome). I had a cover on, because we were still learning (Joey took forever to figure out how to latch properly), and we were with my parents, so I didn't feel like the conversation would stop while I tried to get Joey fed, I didn't feel like all eyes were on my while we struggled with the cover. The conversation continued normally, Joey ate, I ate, we all ate, it was awesome. I would never have been able to do that comfortably if I hadn't seen it so much growing up and if I didn't have that conversation with the co-worker.

All of this has a point and I'm getting there. Two of my very good friends are currently pregnant, one due in October and the other due in January. Both of them want to breastfeed their babies for at least the first few months. That is AWESOME on so many levels. Obviously because it's super good for their babies and all that but on a selfish note: we're going to hang out and have play-dates and nurse our babies together just like my mom did. We're going to have this super cool shared experience in addition to motherhood and I LOVE that. Not that I wouldn't support them if they chose formula, and we would still have play-dates and hang out, and our babies would be exposed to both methods of feeding. But this is still really awesome to me. Getting back to the point. I've already had a sort of breastfeeding lesson with the friend due in October. Dan and I were at their house for a gathering and she had questions. I happily went upstairs to a bedroom with her to give her a better view and answer the questions as best I could. October was grateful that I was so willing to show her because she didn't grow up with the same experience that I did. January also had questions and while she was over at my house, I answered them as best I could and also nursed Joey in front of her (he was hungry anyway, that boy will eat unless he's sleeping...). Because there's only so much you can describe.

This weekend the three of us were headed to the beach for a "just girls" trip. Hurricane Irene changed that and Ocean City is currently under evacuation and no new people are allowed in. January's mom has a condo and was going to let us stay there which totally rocks. Other than swim in the condo's pool, we didn't really have plans, which I was fine with. I like going with the flow. I'll was going to be taking Joey with me, because he is still nursing and I had decided to leave my cover at home. I'll post some links to blog posts and articles that gave me the extra boost of confidence I needed to make this decision, but it does all boil down to that mom nursing her baby who offended my co-worker. She was a catalyst, she inspired me to do research and not just blindly accept what I'd seen. I'm not going to strip off my shirt or whip out my entire boob, and I'm not degrading any nursing moms who are more comfortable with their covers, but I will not be ashamed to nurse my baby and I will not be MADE to be ashamed of what I'm doing.

The decision to leave my cover at home, even though I don't get to hit the beach now, has been so freeing. Despite the possibility of confrontation, not having my cover eliminates a level of anxiety I didn't realize I had. When I use the cover, usually, more of my breast is bare than if I don't use one. This is due to the fact that it's just easier to feed Joey that way, without any clothing in the way. However, the cover can make nursing more difficult because a) I can't see him as well b) he likes to play with it and c) it's just really annoying. When Joey plays with the cover, there's a chance that any onlookers will get a glimpse of some side-boob. When I'm using the cover it's because I'm in mixed company (specifically males that I am friends with or related to) and that affects MY comfort level when I'm nursing. There would have been no such males on our trip to the beach. The cover is one less thing to pack, one less thing to worry about. I have not really cared about what others could see, more like I cared about their reaction if they did see skin. I am not going to worry if a nip slips and someone sees it because their discomfort with a breastfeeding baby is their issue not mine. This decision renewed my excitement for this trip on a whole new level because I was leaving what's left of my anxiety at home with the cover. That's one reason I'm disappointed we won't be going now. I anticipated a stranger approaching me. I'm not naive. I would have had printouts of the law in the diaper bag. If asked to leave an establishment, I planned on waiting for the cops or until I finished my business, whichever came first. Despite not going to the beach, my decision to only use the cover sparingly still stands.

I will sit down and nurse in protest of our culture's oxymoronic sexualization/prudishness of female breasts.

I will do it because there's a chance I'll inspire someone else to nurse their baby or get more information. Just like that random nursing mom in the restaurant.

I will do it for my friends because it is easier to learn if you've seen it.

I will do it for myself. (Yay decreased risk of breast cancer!)

Most of all, I will do it for Joey--whenever and wherever he is hungry.

I am woman. Watch me lactate!

Only a few hours old!

The links I promised:
The Real Reason Not to Cover Up Nursing Mothers
Do mothers breastfeeding in public make you uncomfortable? Yeah, me too.
The Day I Was Told To Stop Breastfeeding at the YMCA
You Got A Problem With My Boobies, PUNK?
Covering Up is a Feminist Issue
Nursing Uncovered
Just Cover Up?
Just pump a bottle?

These were all written by amazing moms who have helped contribute to my breastfeeding confidence!




ETA: Since composing this post last week, I have nursed in public without my cover. No confrontations, no angry looks (that I saw), just me and Joey. My favorite interaction was when I went down to meet a friend at a restaurant/bar in Annapolis. We had this awesome back table in the corner, surrounded by walls on three sides. My friend is a regular and all the employees know her and come talk to her. This table in the corner that night became the "employee table", they would come chat, roll their silverware, even eat their dinner. I was wearing one of my favorite nursing shirts, it covers even my massive boobs to the point where you can't see any skin unless Joey pops off. Joey got hungry, so I started feeding him with a female server and male bartender at our table in addition to my friend. After several minutes, the bartender realized what was going on and decided to take his dinner elsewhere to eat (not suggest that I leave, so points for him). I told him I was fine if he stayed but he said, "No, it's ok, I don't want you to be uncomfortable." When I explained that if I were uncomfortable, I'd use a cover, he added, "I'm just from a different generation" (he was 10 years older than me, max) and headed off to finish his dinner elsewhere. It's worth noting that the female server stayed until one of her tables needed her.

My friend was amazed that I wasn't phased by all the people walking around, I continued talking and eating with Joey latched on. I was proud of myself because it took a while for me to get to that comfort level. I also explained to her another possible reason for the bartender moving from our table. He was uncomfortable, despite saying that he didn't want to cause me discomfort. I explained that he probably felt uncomfortable for me, in a similar way to me feeling awkward for Michael Scott when he does crazy things on The Office. But he (the bartender) was very gracious in his discomfort and did what people should do when they're uncomfortable with breastfeeding: he did not disturb the nursling. He came back later, long after Joey was finished, and we all had a good time chatting and laughing like nothing ever happened. Because nothing did happen. I fed my baby. A baby eating is not a big deal, it's not national news. It's an every day occurrence. So bartender, I can't blame you for your discomfort, but I can thank you for the way you handled it. Well done sir.

Earthquake!

We had an earthquake last summer. I was in my car and didn't feel a thing. I got to work and everyone asked, "Did you feel it?" and I had to ask what they were talking about. Today, was MUCH different.

My job assignment today was working outside. The contractors we were working with are painting up on scaffolding, so we sit outside and watch. I was scheduled to work a 12-hour shift, I did sort of volunteer for it because I need the hours, but I didn't have time to really prepare and have enough milk for Joey stashed away. It's unpredictable how much he'll eat while I'm working on any given day. Sometimes, it's an average of 1oz. per hour I'm gone, sometimes it's 2oz. or more! I had talked to Dan around noon and found out that Joey had already downed almost half the stash in the freezer! This morning, there had been around 16oz., and Joey ate 6oz. when he woke up! Anyway...

After hearing that the weather was supposed to be beautiful all day long, no chance of rain making the job end early. I accepted the fact that Dan would probably have to dip into the emergency formula (that we did NOT purchase, btw, it was sent to us as a sample) and settled into what I thought would be a long shift. Around 1:50pm, I noticed a weird vibration. I didn't notice it at first, because whenever a big truck drives by our house, a similar vibration is produced. I first noticed that it wasn't going away and thought maybe someone was messing with my chair. I looked over at the two co-workers I was with, and they had the same confused look on their faces that I did.
"Are you feeling this?" One asked.
"Yes." We chimed in.

Then it got stronger. Not trees-falling-over or (thank God) scaffolding-collapsing strong, but the ground was visibly shaking. It was the strangest feeling in the entire world, I felt like I was in a movie. Large objects on the site were swaying back and forth and we feared for the men working on the scaffolding. Once the vibration stopped (after about a minute), we got the guys down and evacuated to the parking lot with a bunch of other workers. When it was clear we weren't going to get any more tremors, everyone headed back in, but that was pretty much it for everyone's work day. A "voluntary evacuation" was announced and everyone-and-their-mother got in their car to leave. Traffic was backed up for a while, and I knew it would be a while, so I took the time to have another pump session and let everyone else go nuts trying to leave. My stall tactic did the trick because while traffic out was still a little slow for a random Tuesday afternoon, it was moving pretty consistently and only about 15 minutes was added to my commute home.

I couldn't get a hold of Dan on the phone but text messages were going through, so I was able to make sure that they were ok (and that the house was still standing). Apparently Joey slept through the whole thing, which is ironic because one of his favorite games is "earthquake" where we shake the bed or couch and say "earthquake!!!" and he laughs. I'm not kidding, we've been playing "earthquake" for several weeks now, lol.

Here are the facts about the quake:
The quake was a 5.8 magnitude. It originated in Virgina, and was rumored to have been felt as far south as the Carolinas and as far north as Canada. It was a mile deep and the biggest quake to hit VA since May of 1897. No super major damage was reported and there were really only minor injuries, thankfully.

The $6 Pirate

Whenever I'm in Target or Walmart, I always try and stop by the baby clothes section to see if anything on sale is in the next size up for Joey for the next season. We have a TON of short sleeve onzies, never had to buy any of those either, he's been set all summer from our friends and family who bought them for the baby shower. Fall is coming up and we do have some things that are long sleeve that are a little big, but not much and I doubt they'll be big for long. Thus the shopping in the sale sections. We went to put Joey in a sleep & play for bed last night and, wouldn't you know it, he was too long for it. So Dan went and pulled out another one, same thing. Both of them 3mo sizes. The sleep & plays he has been sleeping in (which are all in the wash right now) are 3-6mo. I asked Dan to grab the pirate one I had recently picked up to see how that fit him, it's a 6mo size and it's by Target's brand Circo--which runs bigger than Carters and Gerber. It's only a little big for him, but he fits it and it should last him at least into some of the chillier weather. Even if it doesn't make it into winter, it was $6 (another reason I love the Circo brand) and I'll easily get my money's worth. Right now, Joey is sleeping on our bed. I really do think that he slept better next to our bed in the bassinet than he does in the crib outside our door. He seems to wake up at shorter intervals. This morning, he woke up between 6 and 7 so I brought him to bed to nurse and cuddle and he's been asleep since--it's now 9. I only do it when it's light outside and I need a few extra minutes of sleep. I don't sleep soundly enough with him in the bed to do have him there all night, plus I'm still scared to death of SIDS and rolling over on him. Cuddling with him works well in the mornings when I need some more sleep and it seems like he needs to be held. He's such a snugglebug :)

Knitting is progressing! I finished the 20-row chart (whatever it's called) and started it over for the second repeat. I'll be doing this all the way down the scarf and if I get daring enough (and depending completely on if I find yarn that's the same weight) I may try to add a stripe or two. I am glad that I stuck with it, I'm especially glad that I finally have something to show for my hard work and it has started to look pretty. I love this color and while I said before that I won't want to keep the scarf, I just might change my mind before it's done. The 20 rows do go pretty quickly. They're repetitive enough that I can memorize the row when I need to, but each row changes so it's enough to keep me interested. I'm still doing this while Joey's sleeping or while Dan's watching him. I do have Dan's scarf on the couch to work on while Joey's awake because that is definitely a more mindless knit than this one is. Before Joey was born, I can't remember the last time I was working on knitting, my free time was spent sleeping. I didn't anticipate not only wanting to knit after he was born, but actually having time to knit. Who knew that newborns/babies slept so much ;)

Joey and Daddy having a staring contest ;)

1 Month vs. 3 Months

Joey at 1 Month Old

Joey at 3 Months Old

Where did this big baby come from? I can't believe how big he's getting. For further proof:

He's so tall that he can rest his feet on the toddler seat part of the tub!

He's starting to splash in the water now :)

He still likes bath time, or still doesn't hate it, however you'd like to look at it. I'm glad because otherwise I wouldn't enjoy bath time. As it is, I love giving him baths, he looks like an old man when his hair is all wet and still doesn't have teeth ;)

I fought The Lace and The Lace did NOT win!

Rivulet is my first venture into lace knitting. The pattern doesn't call for a lace weight yarn, but a yarn slightly heavier. I was actually able to start this project with materials I already had, which was awesome. I was thinking I'd had to buy yarn but at the last minute I looked through my stash and found a whole skein that would be perfect for the project. Technically, it's baby yarn, but it seems to be knitting up nicely. After I ripped out the first 3 rows several times (I believe I'm on my 7th attempt at this scarf) and got past the yarn that I had re-knit with, it became less splitty. It's still kind of splitty, but not nearly where it was when I was redoing the first several rows that had been ripped out. This is a "Nap Time Knit" because it actually requires that I pay attention to the chart and what I'm doing. It's not a mindless knit that I can memorize and work on while Joey's awake and needs things. So I can really only knit it while he's sleeping or while Dan's home to help. Right now, Joey has woken up from his nap, but currently seems to be fine entertaining himself in his crib. He hasn't cried or fussed yet, so we'll see how long he seems happy. It's definitely not a bad thing that he get used to his crib. Right now, he's trying to roll over, lol.

Who took my newborn and left me this big baby?!

Joey turned 3 months yesterday, holy cow! Where has the time gone?? Summer is winding down, I've headed back to work, and I can't believe that my baby isn't a newborn anymore :( Each new phase is so cute and interesting. He's much more interactive, much more vocal, and sooo smiley! He's getting into a routine now that's fairly predictable. It's not a schedule, more of a rhythm. Depending on when he goes down for the night, he'll wake up 1-2 times in the middle of the night and then a few hours later when the sun comes up. Sometimes he's awake for a little while, sometimes he goes right back to sleep but by that time I'm wide awake and I'll stay up and knit or read. Once he wakes up again, he's hungry and usually after he eats he's up for a couple of hours. This is when he's at his happiest, when he talks the most, when he smiles the most, because his tummy is full and he's well rested. Some days he takes long naps during the day, sometimes it's only 20 minutes at a time. In the evenings, he gets cranky more easily, sometimes he fights sleep (but he can't resist the swing! The swing always gets him to sleep when he's fighting it!), sometimes he just wants to comfort nurse. He has started staring intently at the TV (he loves faces) and so I make sure that we turn it off for a while (usually after Dan goes to work) and play or do chores without the background noise of electronics. Then Dan comes home and we have dinner and eventually Joey is too sleepy to fight it and goes down for the night between 9-11pm.

Joey's thinking about lunch ;)

Sleeping babies are the sweetest!

Oh hai there!